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Funny drinking/drunk stories

Anybody ever see a person chug a drink only to discover a cig butt in it ?

INSTANT SOBER !!
Of course there was a bit of projectile spew and his friends had a major laugh ;D

Anyone care to give a story ?

Oh…I have many! Unfortunately, most involve me in some funny and unflattering way :o ;D

One in Cuba I can share…

1st trip to CL (Sol)…We arrived late in the eve (around 10pm), had got to know a few guys on the flight and decided it was too early to head to bed. After we had a bite to eat and wondered down to the ocean, we went to the lobby bar and proceeded to have a great time talking/drinking and smoking a good cigar my newly made friend, the bartender happen to get ahold of for me :wink: Well…I can drink, and I also can feel when the proverbial brick wall is approaching when I’ve had too many. Well…it came at me fast. I went over to the washrooms just by the lobby, did my business (nuff said) and proceeded back to the bar. On the way I decided it was too far ( all 20 steps ) and decided it was better to lay down on the nice cool sidewalk. All along I could hear my wife laughing it up with the others at the bar. After about 20-30mins I hear her say, “Where’s Geoff?”. Then not too long after she says, “I’m heading back to my room” . All good except she has no idea where it is and her night vision sucks. I somehow pry myself off the sidewalk, meet her and stagger back to the room. I think it was around 3-4am when we finally hit the sheets. :o ;D

No judging please…lol ;D

Although I didn’t consider it funny at the time, and the incident played a major role in my developing a great dislike for mega bubbas, I can laugh about it now.

I was sitting poolside , which is an unusual place to find me since we spend almost 100% of our time at the beach, just minding my own business while chatting with hubbie. There were several somewhat intoxicated people pushing each other into the pool close by and I recall one of them saying he was going to the bar for refills. We considered that perhaps we should move to other lounge chairs farther away from the “action”, but didn’t. Bad decision!

Didn’t take long for me to get a full beer bath compliments of the drunk carrying his now refilled mega bubba back to his pals. Thankfully my camera was in it’s underwater case at the time but myself and all of my belongings were soaked with beer.

I don’t drink beer and didn’t appreciate smelling like a brewery, but I’ve heard that some European spas offer various beer therapies at great expense, so I guess I got a free spa treatment as part of my all-inclusive package on that vacation.

[quote=@yvrck]
I don’t drink beer and didn’t appreciate smelling like a brewery, but I’ve heard that some European spas offer various beer therapies at great expense, so I guess I got a free spa treatment as part of my all-inclusive package on that vacation.[/quote]

Hysterical. ;D Thanks for the chuckle!

After a couple of hours of enjoying the music, the atmosphere and sampling the inventory, my buddy, who was sitting with his back to the stage and bar, said "Great band they have here, Eh?"
It was CD’s.

You failed to mention Spunky that every time you went to the bar to get yourself a drink you brought him back two.

Well I didn’t want to mention names, but.
Hey Zuley, you must have a good one for us, eh?

After being on an excursion bus for some time, sipping too much beer, a friend of mine was glad to see the bus pull over in the town square 'cause he really “had to go”. So he ran across the street to a tiny bar and with his limited Spanish yelled out something at the waiter hoping for directions to the loo.

All the men started laughing and waving at him, poor guy…
He had landed in a gay bar!

What did he say that was so funny?

“Donde es los hombres?”

On one trip to CL , we went there with another ex-poster from here ( sad ) . There was a group of about 8 or 10 guys that were all about 40 to 55 yrs old. They were only at the bar at evening and there was also a guy that looked about 20 and very effeminate looking. At this point in the story I will say that after 2 or 3 or in this case 11 drinks or so I tend to lose inhibitions , common sense , tact , etc. I My wife got up to use the ladies room and our friends were quite puzzled by the group at the bar.
Bear in mind that CL in gay friendly . After a little while of our friends t5talking to each other about the group I told them to just go and ask them if they are a big gay group. They answered me back " Why don’t you go and ask them for us ?? !! ". So of course I said " Okay! ". I pondered the type of question that I would ask so as to be as eloquent and sophisticated as possible about my query.
So , after 4 tenths of a second after I went up to the bar with the group and lots of other people ,I came up with " Is the young guy the dessert cup ? " and I started to laugh and fortunately , so did a bunch of the guys there. About this time , my wife comes back form the ladies room and sees our friends hiding behind the table and since I am not with them , I must be in something. And I am. My wife said to our friends " You DARED him ??? "
Like I said , I lose inhibitions as I gain Vitamin R.

Last trip , it was naked cannonballs in the pool at midnight.

I should also say that the large guy group " claimed " to be fishing there .
They were fishing 600 to 800 yds off the nude beach.
Yeah, right !

God protects children, fools and …
Sounds like our Rum Trees were well pruned, that trip.

Arrived at a new resort late in the evening. Got checked in and then driven to our room. Put a few things away and headed back to the lobby bar for a few drinks.
Left the bar much later and when we got back to the room the key card wouldn’t work. Went back to reception and got a new card. Back to the room again and still couldn’t get in. Another trip to reception where they checked the computer, zapped another card and assured me that this one would work, but same problem. This time reception called for a service guy to meet us at the room. As we were heading back to the room I saw a service guy dismantling the card reader at the building next to “ours”.
We had the right room location but in the wrong building. Apologised to the service guy for his late night call then back to reception to apologise to the very patient ladies there.

[quote=@spunky]God protects children, fools and …
Sounds like our Rum Trees were well pruned, that trip.[/quote]

Most trips, actually.

Does breaking your foot four hours after arriving at a resort count as a funny story? There was alcohol and pink bums in bikinis involved. Have not been back to Mexico since.

Care to “Flesh” that out?

Of course !
Details !!

VCC,
Eldorado Royal, Mayan Riviera, 8 years ago. Walking back to my wife with the next round of beers in my hand. Had been there for all of 4 hours at that point. Was paying more attention to the the little cutie in the bikini walking ahead of me than where I was going. Stepped off of the curb and ended up on my kiester. Was pretty impressed that I did not spill the beers until someone pointed out the bone trying to escape from the side of my foot. My wife being in the business fabricated a make shift cast out of a tensor and a new pair of Reeboks we had packed. Still managed to have a great time. Didn’t do a lot of dancing. 16 weeks in an air cast once we got home.

It’s good to have someone in the family to set the fracture but my health care pro is pretty skimpy on sympathy when it’s a self-inflicted wound. :wink: LOL

zuley, OOOCCCCHHH !!

Spunky, I think our ladies both have the same attitude. However, P would not have been coming home on the same plane as me had she not fixed me up.